My grandad once told me you can tell you’re becoming older when:
Your back goes out more than you do.
You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
You sink your teeth in a steak and… they stay there.
He also told me, you can tell when you’re really really getting on when you sit in a rocking chair and can’t get it going. I’m delighted to report I’m not at that stage yet and I hope I never get there either, but there are times when we just can’t get ourselves going. Or at least it’s a big effort to do so.
Some of us are still in lockdown, some of us are now easing back in to work, many of us are going through a few challenges. Most of us are having to adapt to the ‘new normal’ we find ourselves in and for some of us it would be so easy to give in and not bother.
Whenever we experience change, the change always becomes the new normal. My grandad taught me with change there are always challenges and challenges are an opportunity to learn and grow.
I wouldn’t wish ill on anyone, going through hardship is not nice and can be very painful, but I’ve learnt that we always get through it somehow. Besides, if we didn’t have any bad times how could we appreciate the good times?
So here are 5.5 (that’s right, five and a half) insights that have helped me in life and hopefully now you, adapt to change and the new normal, build resilience, step up, step forward and step onwards.
1) Be Solution Focussed
Be solution-focussed not problem-focussed. What’s been done has been done; now focus on your options, and the best way to solve the issue is to get done whatever needs to be done.
2) Do Not Fear Making Mistakes
Don’t be afraid of making mistakes; wisdom comes from making mistakes and will help us to avoid making mistakes in the future.
3) Eliminate Unsupportive People
Do your best to eliminate unsupportive people from your life. You know the ones, they keep telling you you’re an idiot or that you’re not good enough. Boy, have I had a few of those lately. If you can’t get rid of them (e.g. they may be a spouse), when they say something you don’t like, ask them how helpful they think they’re being or how helpful they think the statement they’re making is. Then ask them what the most helpful thing is they could do or say to help you.
4) Seek Supportive People
Seek out helpful supportive people. One way of doing that is by being helpful and supportive to others yourself.
5) Celebrate Past Successes
Remind yourself of past successes and be grateful for what you have in your life that you like, love and that’s going well. Usually, when we’re upset about something, it’s about one aspect, not every aspect of our lives. Granted, that one thing can affect everything else, but stay focussed.
5.5) Remember Remember Remember
Remind yourself you’re just doing the best you can with what you have. You are responsible for your life and you might not be able to control what happens to you but you can control what you do and how you feel about it.
As For Grandad
It’s a long while since grandad left my life but he never left my heart and is always in my thoughts.
And when you do reach that certain age in life my dear reader, as my grandad did, may you continue to have a gleam in your eye. But not the same gleam my grandad had, for him that gleam was actually the sun hitting his bifocals ;)